You Make Me Live

Mar 05 2010

Inspiration for the Day

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You know how a few weeks ago I wrote about feeling guilty for having a good life and wishing there was more I could do to save the world? Well let me just say for now that our good friends Ryan & Allison are really inspiring me to think outside of the box…

They are currently in Africa (partnering with Compassion International) in an effort to bring awareness to the tremendous needs of the country through real people via blogging. If you want to look at what life is like in Kenya and read some honest facts about the organization, then go check out his blog and stay tuned throughout their visit.

I have a lot more thoughts brewing, but I need to collect them all before I write more :)

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Feb 26 2010

32 weeks

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How far along? 32 weeks (8 months!)
Total weight gain: up 25 lbs since pre-pregnancy…I am pretty sure that each of my legs weighs 20 lbs because they sure are holding onto that water!! Donny says I no longer have “cankles” (ankles that are so swollen that they blend into your calves) but I have “cighs” because my whole calf is swollen to the point that my knees are disappearing! Other than my hands, I don’t seem to have swelling anywhere else, so I guess I should just be thankful I can somewhat hide my tree trunks.
Sleep: starting to need more of it lately…I can definitely tell that my body is wearing out more easily and that the “honeymoon” stage of the 2nd trimester is officially over
Best moments this week: 1) we started the nursery & the painting is finished! 2) I finished sewing his crib quilt…which is quite an accomplishment for me because I am NOT very good at sewing…my goal is to greatly improve in the near future, though :) It has some definite imperfections, but good thing he won’t care :)
Food cravings: milk & Chipotle
Gender: BOY!!
What I miss: jeans!! The maternity jeans I had that I was waiting to grow into are still annoyingly uncomfortable because they fall down all the time and I can’t find any others that I like because I’m picky about jeans anyway. So I pretty much live in leggings, and although they are super comfortable, I can’t wait to get back into my jeans and have some more outfit options :)
What I am looking forward to: our first shower next week!
Milestones: no real milestones this week…I do have to start having bi-weekly doctor’s appointments now…I guess that’s something.

From BabyCenter:

By now, your baby weighs 3.75 pounds and is about 16.7 inches long, taking up a lot of space in your uterus. You’re gaining about a pound a week and roughly half of that goes right to your baby. In fact, he’ll gain a third to half of his birth weight during the next 7 weeks as he fattens up for survival outside the womb. He now has toenails, fingernails, and real hair (or at least respectable peach fuzz). His skin is becoming soft and smooth as he plumps up in preparation for birth.

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Feb 21 2010

We Started The Nursery!

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Thanks to both grandmas and Aunt Jenny we now have a beautifully painted nursery just waiting to be filled be lots of cute baby stuff :) It is so exciting to finally have some color on those walls! This room has always been just a catch all kind of guest room…except for when it had a short life as Jenny’s bedroom. We never decorated this room because we really just didn’t have a reason to and we never really had furniture to put in it anyway. I guess when we moved in 4 years ago we always figured it would be a nursery at some point, we just never knew when. Now that the time has come, I’m glad we never decorated it before because the basically empty room and white walls sure made it easy to start turning it into an official nursery.

After going back and forth about colors, we decided to paint all the walls a warm gray and I am so happy we did because I LOVE the way the color turned out! The furniture and textiles we have for the room will really “pop” against these walls.

(Check out my mom’s super handy step ladder[s] that she made the night before)

Our baby is so lucky to have these two hot mamas for grandmas!!

While they were painting, I tackled a little project of my own. I was on the lookout for a vintage rocking chair to match our “vintage-looking” crib and Craiglist came through again! I found this rocking chair advertised for $20, but was able to get for only $10 because the seat was damaged and the lady selling it didn’t realize it was broken because she had it stuffed in the back of her shed for so long. My dad was able to easily repair the seat with some scrap wood and now that it is painted, you would never know it was damaged. After 1 coat of primer and 3 coats of paint, my rocking chair is finished and I think it is one of my favorite pieces of furniture in our whole house!

I did a photo shoot of my friend’s little guy today and he got to officially break the chair [and the freshly painted nursery] in!

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Feb 12 2010

Confession

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This past weekend I had a really bad day…it was one of those days where everything was going wrong and one thing seemed to have a domino effect on the other. I had to spend my whole “free” day (which never happens) remedying all of the things that were going wrong and before I knew it, the day was over. The fact that I felt like my whole day was wasted just made me more upset because I rarely get much free time to myself and I had been looking forward to that time all week. Donny was not home all day – which was probably a good thing because my pregnancy hormones were making me extra emotional and made every little thing seem bigger and more annoying.

Fast forward a few days and I feel SUPER guilty for letting myself get upset by things that were not that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things. There I was wasting time feeling sorry for myself when I should be investing time in things that really matter…like what I can do to help the people of Haiti …or how I can help my church raise money to buy the building we are renting…or catching up with friends and family I haven’t talked to in awhile…or spending time with God…and the list goes on and on.

Do you ever feel guilty for having a good life? I know that may seem like such a crazy question, but I struggle with that a lot if I’m being perfectly honest. My life is very blessed…I have a Savior who loves me, an amazing husband, two great families, the best friends a girl could ask for, a house, a car, a good job, the perfect dog, and now I have been blessed with a baby boy who will be welcomed into this world before I know it.

It is not fair that I’m “living the good life” while at the same time being surrounded by friends and family who are dealing with really hard things like cancer, serious health issues, divorce, depression, sexual assault, infertility, job loss, debt, family problems, death, etc. I often wonder what the world would be like if those of us who didn’t have as many issues could literally take some of the burden away from others who seem to be carrying the weight of the world on their shoulders. Then things would be more fair and even and maybe the world would be a better place?

I hate feeling of being helpless, though. I tend to be a dreamer and a lot of the ideas I come up with are not even remotely feasible. I am the type who wishes I was able to adopt all of the displaced children of Haiti and provide a safe and secure life for them rather than donate money to one of the many Haiti relief organizations. Or I wish there was a way that my healthy cells could cure the cancer cells rather than feeling like all I can do is pray and cook meals for the sick people in my life.

Don’t get me wrong…I am extremely thankful for the blessings in my life…I just wish life was more fair. I wish I could really do more to save the world…or at least do more to help the people in my life that need it. I need to learn to not feel guilty for the blessings in my life and instead figure out new ways to use them to help the people I love.

(The picture above was taken on top of one of the cliffs Donny and I hiked in Red River Gorge this past July. The peace sign was one of many interesting things we found carved into the rocks up there).

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